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Scattypaws
bogwitch

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I feel like I'm under an avalanche of ill will for no good reason other than for stating an unpopular preference. If it wasn't for the sanity of wiseacress I think I'd just jack this whole thing in.

It's just too upsetting for something so utterly trivial.

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I'm so sorry you're upset. I think it's hard to have discussions about heated topics over the internet -- there's so much that gets lost. I think something like 75% of communication is non-verbal, and all that is lost online, no matter how many qualifiers and smiley faces one adds. Sometimes the best thing to do is let it drop (not LJ, just whatever the debate is) so that you can see that you're right -- it is trivial in the larger scheme of things.

Really sorry you're distressed though. I hope tomorrow is better.

I was ok yesterday because I could step back. Today seems like a domino effect where I become a pariah for having a different opinion and sticking up for it.

I couldn't give a crap what other people want to read or write because that's their choice. I was talking about me personally.

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Oh dear. No idea what the unpopular preference was, but heavens... surely there's room in the world for more than one flavor of preference.

Odd day this. I'm seeing a lot of people posting about feeling bad, whether it's because of lack of response to what they post or responses they'd rather not have had. I wish I had nice, warm, chocolate chip cookies to pass out to everyone.

For what it's worth, what you like is what you like. I don't pick my friends by what they like. I pick them by what *I* like, which happens to be my friends. (I know that was circular.)

Have some hot chocolate, or chicken soup, or whatever makes you feel better, and let all the negatives slide off you like water off a duck's back. None of it really matters.

Thanks.

It was the porch_talk kerfufle I ended up in the centre of. I don't like reading slash, they do end of story.

The fact I have a number of people on my friends list who write slash and I have no problems with them, should say something, right?

I'm not sure what the trivial, unpopular preference is, but I am sorry that you're feeling battered and buried by an avalanche of dissenting opinions. And I wish I could think of something that would perk you up.


Well I suppose avalanche was a bit of a stretch, but things have been said over LJ that I know I'm the cause of and I really don't think I said anything out of place in porch_talk anyway.

What is the problem of not liking slash? I have no problem if others like it.

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How pathetic is it that I'm always completely unaware of the kerfuffles (or is it kerfluffles?) Even in the Live Journal world I'm still a nerd. That's okay I guess and I hope you realize that there are others around who don't necessarily like slash either -- and also don't dislike the writers of that same slash.

Some of my best friends are slashers! And some of my best friends aren't. I like it that way.

:o)

I wouldn't give it the kerfuffle rating, but others have. I always knew I'd get in trouble at porch_talk somewhere along the line. But I wonder if people have actually read what I said before sounding off. It's just... dunno, grrr.

I went and had a look at the group. What did you say??? I think sometimes, something just hits a nerve and there's a sort of reflex response that's more about people insecurities than anything you said. Doesn't make it any the less nasty though!

I had something similar in a Yahoo British Writers Group when I dared to say you don't necessarily need a beta. (Pretty stupid for a dyslexic, but whatcha gonna do!) World War III naturally broke out. It was assumed I was every sort of bad fanfic writer, who never so much as read her work through, just banged out any out anything and persumablely didn't bother with capitals or puncuation!!! Soon I realised that people were responding to what other people had said, not my comment at all, as you said.

After I while I realsed there was just no point in saying anything. The pro-betas won. Only thing was, I don't think anyone dared say what they thought anymore and the group died. Oh and 2 LJ friends offered to beta! lol I'm such a hypocrite!

I think the thing is, yes it's really hurtful but it's a sort of web-induced thing, a reflex like a greyhound chasing an electric rabbit. What I'm tryng to say is it's not really personal it's just people sounding off on their pet themes.

Oh bugger this! I'm off to watch Neighbours! ;0)


Thanks, of course you are so right. I'm less upset now, but I'm still a smoking volcano, so they'd better watch it!

I wasn't really upset at the thread, more at what people who hadn't particpated in it said in reaction. I don't even know if this one particular person who set me off (who isn't on my friends list), even read what I or anyone else said - it didn't sound like it. People might make assumptions on me based on no evidence, and that pisses me off.

As for the beta thing. I think it depends on how good you are at checking your own work. All the errors found by my betas so far have been relatively minor, so I could probably get away with it. That doesn't mean that having another pair of eyes have a look isn't a good idea.

Enjoy neighbours!

People might make assumptions on me based on no evidence, and that pisses me off.

*Nods* That's what's so frustrating - there's no logic to it.

That doesn't mean that having another pair of eyes have a look isn't a good idea.

Oh yeah, particularly in my case, but some of these women had like 3 betas per story some from different genres. One would be told to completely rewrite her story... and did! She was the most vosiferous... oh don't get me going!

Way too much hastle for someone who turns out the odd bit of Spike-related porn! *le sigh*

Anyhow, don't get bitter and twisted like me! Rise above it! :0)


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Ouch.

Don't take it to heart, sweetie. I've never been involved in the whole fandom thing before now and it has never ceased to amaze me how strongly people can react when they feel their particular area of it is being slighted (even when there is no cause to feel that way).

Me? Not a slash fan. No objections to it, I'll read it if it's well written, it just doesn't turn me on or interest me especially.

Except - I won't read it when it concerns Spike, because I feel so deeply and passionately for what I see as his character as it is now, and slash doesn't fit. It feels wrong and uncomfortable for my Spike to be doing this, and it jars so much it ruins the whole story. But that's just my perception of Spike - everyone else is entitled to their opinion - I choose not to read it.

And you'll be fed up with the whole thing by now so I'll shut up!

I'm still just quietly fuming.

I'm glad you see it that way. I just want to be able to say what I enjoy and why. What other people like has nothing to do with it. There's lots in fan fic I don't like, first person, script form, anything with no Spike in, etc, its not just slash and there's no reason why one day I might read something that includes all of those.

I was watching Graham Norton last night. I adore GN, but he some joke about being gay and it really prickled me. These people are producing an emotional response in me that wasn't there before and that makes me fume.

And people assume that because it was slight disagreement, which I think was civil, and it was about slash, it must have been them being attacked and the same old arguements. I'm probably guilty in part for the direction the conversation went, but I was responding to quite persistant questioning from the poster about my preferences. I was the one attacked and I backed out when I was.

I think some other stuff happened later in the thread too, but nothing I think was too out of order (I only skimmed it) so I shouldn't have taken it all so personally, but PMS does that!

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